Forced writing is meaningless. I have become a generic writer just typing out regurgitated words of others. My writing is worthless when it is not raw and true. I am attempting to be something I am not. This is not my heart and soul. My head is spinning but nothing is coming out. If I used to be able to write I cannot anymore for my heart is full but my pen has run dry.

True joy is found only in doing God's will for your life.

Poetry has seemed to curl up and die inside of me. When a part of me was broken it was so simple to "put words together beautifully" and now that life is going well it seems as if poetry has disappeared, as if the words no longer flow from my fingertips. I have never been a good writer, maybe I have never been a writer at all. My writing is average but it will never bring tears to one's eyes or change a part of their lives. I desire to so swiftly and gracefully string words into beautiful phrases but its inadequacy is quite haunting. Music is in my veins, it flows through every fiber of my being but does writing even hold a candle to it? Will I ever write something meaningful? Writing is relief. Writing is escape. But is my writing impactful? I don't believe it is so maybe I should just put my pen down for good. I am not a writer. Some are born with the curse/blessing of having to get words out and their words move in the hearts of others and cause tears to well up in the eyes of people but my writing, all my writing is is a sad joke compared to true writers. So maybe it is finally time to cap my pen and never pick it up again.